The Euphenisms - Peter Reading

Portrait by Peter Edwards.

Cracker,Potty, Loony, Bonkers,
Nutty, Screwy, Ga-Ga, Dull,
Strange, Do-Lally,Dopey, Silly,
Touched, A Bit M.,Up the Pole,

Zany, Crazy, Dotty, Batty,
Round the Bend, Remedial, Slow,
Cranky, Turned, Moonstruck, Quixotic,
Odd, Beside Oneself, Loco,

Rambling, Giddy, Flighty, Crackbrained,
Soft, Bewildered, Off One's Head,
Wandering, Wild, Bereft of Reason,
Daft, Distracted, Unhinged,

Attributes of Simple Simons,
Asses,Owls, Donkeys, Mules,
Nincompoops, Wiseacres, Boobies,
Noodles, Numbskulls, Gawks, Tomfools,

Addle/Silly/Chuuckle/Dunder/
Sap/Bone/Block/Thick/Muddle/Crack-
Heads, The E.S.N., The Balmy,
Silly Billies,Dunces,Jack-

Asseas, Dullards, Merry Andrews,
Mooncalves, at least one MP,
Vauxhall Workers (and Execs), Clods,
Paisleyites, Twerps, Playd Cymru...

FROM :-
Collected Poems
(Bloodaxe Books, Newcastle, 1995)